Monday, 1 May 2017

Be strong my dear

My special writing for my special friend.
u know who u are and i know u will read this piece of my writing

For not be a able to calm u down
I'm so sorry
For not be able to be beside u when u are in tears
I'm so sorry
To can't be beside u to hear your sorrow
I'm so sorry

Only Allah knows how break my heart it is when i know i can't do anything for u
Only Allah knows how hurt my heart it is when i know the tears coming down ur face

N for the first time i can't find the right words and right sentences for calm u down
for that i'm really sorry

Last time we promised. I promised
To be beside u to hear your sadness
like u did for me before when happiness can't find me
To find the right words to calm n cheer u up
like u did to me before when i failed to know what smile it is
To hold your hands n said its okay ALLAH still loves u
like u did to me before when myself started to blame HIM

I tried my best to do all the things but finally in the end everything is failed.
n for that reasons i do blame myself and i'm so sorry..
But here is my words

Allah never ever let us down. He will never ever let us alone in the dark
Allah never promise that life will be easy
But He do promise that He will be with us in every steps in our life

I know. 
Today will be hard, 
Tomorrow will be hardest.
But do remember. the rain n dark which covered the sky
will finally let the sun to bring its shine
just exactly like our day,
ALLAH gives us 1001 reasons to cry
but He also gives us 1001 reasons to smile
So keep smiling. as He always watching. 

Monday, 6 June 2016

People and Darkness

I like to write, something that can make me calm is when my fingers can speak out the words from my heart
but there are always time when the tears comes out earlier than expected
n the heart hurt before the fingers can calm the heart
n lately times becomes the barrier
i wish one day i will not forger how calm it is when i can let the fingers to calm my heart

they easily can see the other people in the light.
but ever u see someone who can see u in the dark
n people ask me, how to see other people in the dark?
n how can that ability can save and calm other people
n why we need to do that.

there will be a time when sorrow surround their day
but for some people they can show their sorrow on their face
they hide it in the their smile

Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow.
I still wish. i still hope.
there will be a time where people can see other people's tears 
behind other people's smile
they can see the present of other person despite the darkness of the day
they can hold other peoples hand who gasping for the air of hope.

one day u can see that people.
u ever known this type of people
hold their hand. n tell them
please. stay in my story of life
because only your shining presents can give the light to my darkness day.

If and only if u know that person
Love them until the last of the breatth
because maybe they will be the first and last time
u ever known that that type of people..

Saturday, 30 April 2016

Life Changes

Dear my diary aka my blog
Lately i'm wondering what the people wants and expected in other people.
did they expected that all people to be perfect like they are?
or did they expected all people can become exactly like they wanted?
people have weakness. and sometimes they do learned and tried to change
not to change to become exactly like people around them wanted
but to change to be a better person
but sometimes also changes need an effort, support n time
n when people around them who expected changes without considering this factors
the changes becomes hard
 n finally the people who initially wants to changes be hurt
so please before u want to change people
understand them.
then support them
even when they do the little things that still hurt u
still understand they have tried.
n trying demands time and sacrifice
coretan hati luahan rasa
taman sentosa, taiping perak
Tuesday, 8 March 2016

Thank you

Some of beutiful people that I met during my journey
they are not coming in promise
they are not coming with a warn
they even not the people that I have known for years
but they are people that lighting the sorrow of life in taiping
never imagine in my life before a short welcoming event finally become a deep relationship.

siapa kata hidup jauh itu mudah
siapa kata hidup sendiri itu indah
tapi tatkala hati mengeluh memikirkan masa depan
tika itu Dia menyisipkan bunga kebahagian di sebalik kehadiran mereka
Dia kirimkan sebuah ceritera suka duka pahit manis bersama mereka

ceritera suka yang bisa memberikan dirimu sebuah senyuman

ceritera duka yang bisa mengingatkan mu tentang realiti kehidupan

cerita pahit agar pengajaran itu tetap bersamamu

ceritera manis yang bisa memberikan dirimu sebuah kenangsn terindah

supaya nanti suatu hari nanti kau berani melantangkan
Allah tidak meletakkan jalan menuju kejayaan itu dengan semata duri. sebaliknya akan Dia selitkan bunga2 keindahan

andai satu hari nanti perpisahan menanti
ku tahu kata2 itu akan sangat berat untuk diungkapkan
tetapi ketahuilah
sebuah kenangan itu tidak akan pudar di sebalik ucapan perpisahan

terima kasih

untuk masa terluang

terima kasih

untuk kata2 membina

terima kasih

untuk tangan yg menggapai

terima kasih 

memori tercipta

terima kasih 

untuk semua. 

Sunday, 16 August 2015

Deeply hurt inside

jika air mata itu bisa berbicara.
nescaya ia berkata.
tidak puas2 lagikah dirimu membiarkan diriku mengalir.
dan tika itu jawapanku hanya satu.
tiada pilihan bagiku.
hanya dirimu yang terus setia menemaniku.

#deeplyhurtinside #onlyHEknowsthetruth #makemestrongYaALLAH
Tuesday, 3 June 2014

Feel grateful

Sometimes there are times that unintentionally, without realizing i have asked Him
Why He do this to me? For what i have done why i still cant get what i want.
Why others can get but not me? Why He kept testing me?
Why the world so unfair to me?
I know itz hurt. Itz hurt me as well.
Without me myself realize i do a cruel sin.
I didnt accept qada' and qadar written by Him
How sinfull person i am.

Forgive me ya Allah.
I've kept repeating my mistake.
Even i know You already promise
He will give me the best. Not the best that i want, but the best that i should get

I teach myself, to be positive.
I tell myself that Allah have better plan for me,
I trust it because i have seen it.
I have seen a person. Who are for me is a very hardworking and amazing person
Which in my mind either i cant be like that person
But, unfortuntely that person didnt get what that person want..
I'm shocked. I'm feel to low. Why? I didnt do as much as that person did but i get what i want
Without other persons realizing, i kept trace about that person
What happened to that person after that.
Yeah. That person never give up. Becase that person trust on fate! That person will get what that person want. Maybe not now but later.

After few years, i feel like want to know what happened to that person.
Alhamdulillah, finally that person success. 
Success that maybe none of us will predict that person will finally success
Not in term of very successful yet but success.
Itz enough right? Why u should asked more if little is already enough?

Trust Him. Accept what He give now. Never give up. And always. Always. Think positive.
Doesnt mean that He didnt answer u now, He will not answer u forever,
Doesnt mean He didnt give what u want today, He will not give it to u forever,
He will. If itz good for u, but He wouldnt if it is bad for u. But trust Him. He will give better things for u as a replacement. 
So, for what reasons u must complaining 1001 things to Him? 
Feel grateful. Be thankful. The life that He give to us already are meaningful and priceless.
And without realizing, actually we already asked too much from Him.
So, its a good thing right if we can find some time to say 'Alhamdullilah' to him rather than complaining and blaming to Him? 

Saturday, 31 May 2014


as a human. as a normal human
there always be a time when we did not satisfied with what we have
we start complaining about 1001 stuffs in our life.
feeling that what we get is the lowest. the other persons is better
n from that we start blaming. to all people around us. and sometimes to HIM

then. what should we do?
ALLAH already give everything to us.
but maybe not in the way that we want
not in the portion that we ask
but, still the "amount" will be the same
how about us?
did we give HIM the same "amount" HE should get from us?
ask ourself.
answer ourself.

Ya ALLAH, ikhlaskan hatiku. tetapkan imanku. tetapkan niatku.
disebalik doa, keikhlasanlah yang ku pohon
kerana ku tahu.
tiap langkahkah, tiap ibadahku, tiap amalanku.
tanpa keikhlasan,
ibarat mencurah air ke daun keladi.
tiada kesannya. di hatiku. di tempat Mu
dan aku tetap berada di tempat sama.
bantu aku ya ALLAH.
bantu mereka ya ALLAH.
sesungguhnya tiap langkahku
selalunya mereka akan meninggalkan kesan
agar diriku bertambah baik dari sehari ke sehari.
jadikan aku dia n mereka. hamba-hambaMu yang senantiasa bersyukur
agar tiap langkah, ibadah n amalan kami
senantiasa mendapat redha Mu ya ALLAH..

Friday, 23 May 2014

i'm soo sorry

complicated feelings of mine,
that is who i am.
kadang2 betul dalam percakapan kita kena hati2.
sebab tanpa sedar adakalnya ia melukai walaupun ia bukanlah niat di hati.
for those who involved.

i'm so sorry..
even how much i wish i did not hurt anybody, but still i kept repeating my mistake.
i'm so sorry
when without me n myself realize i kept make people touched n hurt with what i'm doing.
but please. understand me. as a human sometimes i cant help it.
my emotions controlled myself more than i can controlled it.
i'm so sorry..
sometimes i make decision without thinking because maybe thinking too much make it more difficult.
i'm so sorry
when sometime i do something that is no one can predicted.
but trust me, most of the time my decisions. my steps. my choices.
i have another reasons behind it.
for what reasons i'm doing it.
which sometimes i cant tell what is it
which sometimes i did not want to put too much hope on it
n which sometimes i just like making surprise.

rasa sedih n syahdu bila fikir tadi dah kelas terakhir. 
kelas terakhir untuk degree bpharm ni
n mungkin kelas terakhir sampai bila2 la kot.
master? not in my mind for now.
sweetness, sourness, bitterness n etc during these 4 years.
teach me a lot.
which maybe become the best memories in my life.

u dont need 1000 pictures in ur hand to remember all the memories when u already have 1 in ur heart.

with love:
22 may 2014
Saturday, 17 May 2014

Things i want to ask

if there are something that i can ask for.
2 things that i need:
1. please do not treat me like someone else different. treat me like who i am. i am the same person, yesterday today n insyaALLAH tomorrow. so, please do not treat me like this
2. please do not be there for me. be there with me. it will be different. i dont need people to be there for something. i just need people to be there with me, so that we can do something together. 

#finalsem #finalyear #bpharm #usm #studentslifeendsoon
Sunday, 11 May 2014


Yesss. I am the laziest person when it comes to take the medicine. (Wlaupun rasa macam banyak benda lagi aku malas). Pharmacist ke tak itu belakang kira.. Gituuu..
I hate to take the medicine. Thats the fact. It was a good thing when people can 'force' me to take it without me willing to do that. (Sebab kadang2 memang dah sakit yang tak tertahan tu, atau takut makin teruk)
Even my parents will choose to see me take the medicine in front of them because they absolutely do not trust me when it comes about taking the medicine. Haha!!!
Please do not feel weird why i am choosing this course even me myself was the worse person with compliance. Pandai nasihat, buat takkk,,, gagaga

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